White hair.

Life flashes before my eyes, I can smell her hair that are now white. It had always been my definition of beauty. That scent.                                                                                       Over the years,it had become a part of me and yet I was never fulfilled. It still came from her, and I always lingered. The hunger still remained. I wish I could could take it with me. I can’t remember how many years we have been together, how many arguments we’ve had, the jewellery and clothes she owns but I do remember the first time she glanced at me, how she looked into my eyes with hers. When her curls spilled  themselves across her face and she took her hand to remove them.  Between her hair, through our eyes, our souls had caught on fire.

I lay in her lap, my life at her disposition, her toes touching my hair every now and then. I realised this is where I truly belonged. She was my goddess and I was here at her feet.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              I was breathing my last breaths they exclaimed, don’t crowd him they said. I wanted to be there, at her feet. With the whole world in haziness and only her insight. Her, me, us and our memories. After all the phases, positions and places in our lives, I had found where I belonged. It took me my death bed to find that out. I wanted my last breaths to be taken away by her, her kisses had always made me breathless. Only because she was so passionate and so divine.

She asked me- “Shall I get up and lay you on the bed?”
Her white hair reflected the light from the tube and her wrinkled hands shivered as she said. I smirked and she smiled. we both knew the answer. A translucent layer of tears brimmed her eyes as she gleamed in sadness and happiness.
We both knew,
The night would come and a day anew
People would eventually scatter,
Go to their respective homes and chatter,
Come back to check on me in the morning,
There would be tears and a lot of mourning,
But we’ll be here smiling,
As our bodies will lay, side by side
Like the water with its tide.
In heaven we’ll meet as the world tells stories of our love; I’ll take her scent and she my touch.

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The Walk To Ecstasy

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“CEO”; The title that hung outside her door.
“Mrs. Duke”; The one society knew her to be.

The French windows behind her glass desk overlooked another building just like her own. Glass, grey. Sophisticated. Just like all the other buildings in New York. 50 years now in the company, she was one of the finest and richest women of her time. The photo frames only captured moments of false happiness that were forced by the camera men. Who was family?

She was clueless about where they were till christmas, till then even a phone call was a gift. Pearls, heels and suits; her life revolved around it. Deep In thought she noticed that the next building threw a shadow on her office wall and created a delightfully good figure of a tree.
She couldn’t think of the last time she saw an actual tree or park until that day when she took that walk.
-On that auspicious day, he read out the words tears in his eyes and his heart overwhelmed with joy and sorrow both. He knew not what he was to feel, but he knew how right it was.

” Today, I’ll write. Not because someone asked me to, not because I’m forgotten or because I want to be. I don’t want to run away (Secretly, deeply maybe) or get drunk and lay but because I want to be.

Darkness is not evil, it could be a little scary though. I want to walk, and so my dear I’m taking it.

I want to walk, miles and miles without water, without food and books to read. Not because I despise them but because I want to know how it would be without the things I live by.

No money, no, not a penny!

On the dark roads, I’ll walk. My head held high, as though a crown had been bestowed to my head and destiny! Did you know as a little girl I always wanted to be a princess? When I’m a little too tired to go on, the street lights would shine upon me remind me of my destiny.

To walk, to walk and never look back. In the silence of that night, the roads would lead me to the forest. The grass and the animals.
All beings, breathing but sleeping. These days, all too restlessly.

The wind and me, childhood lovers. We’ve been there for quite long now. Let me walk, let me see what you’ve got for me. He plays with my hair, like the younger days of first kisses and romance. Those men had been so wrong and me so naive.  In the midst of my journey, I shall fall in love with the trees, handsome and tall. The branches all over, roots too. But their grandeur too, ends somewhere. We humans, the littlest beings forget that.
Their handsomeness with them, shall die to but not their fruit. They give on.

Here, I shall be admiring them, in awe of their majesty yet I must remember to move on.
You must walk past it, capture it but walk. Forward. Always.

Through the ferns and leaves, covered in dew and mist. I shall greet thee. Like old friends they would wave at me, not leaving their branch and yet spreading smiles. Glistening from the recent rain like an adorned bride, with a heavy heart I shall wave them goodbye. I meet now the mountains, grand and bold. Standing with pride as they do, they smirk in approval to my journey. I bow down in respect.

I see now a land. Mud, wet and fertile. So soft and feminine, like the womb of a mother.

She is a mother to the blooming world except you simply forgot. Let me just stay here for a little while. Ive walked too much. Heavy eyes, stars above my sight. So beautiful. My legs now tired from the journey. The visions, the sights.

Did I see the world enough? I asked my soul, he approved. Anything you’d want to say?

He said to me, I’m glad you din’t live the life I thought you would. You’re exactly where you should! You made me see, all that the world could be. I’m at peace now ! I lay on the wet bed of Mother Earth. The wind cuddling and embracing me. The trees admiring me. The ferns and leaves leaving their abode to fly to me. The mountains sending their blessings indeed.

I’m content, I’m complete.

My lovers and friends all here, the rest is history. I close my eyes, ask Mother Earth to take me in.
Now, my love I can say I’ve lived. The angels await.

Spring, shall be my funeral. The witness shall be you and the world.

Its a celebration! Of life not that which is gone but the one that lived! My lovers and friends were true indeed, stood by me till death did us apart.

With them, I had no papers, no bonds nor marriage or tags.
With them I had, love and purity.

We lived, so celebrate me as she dissolves me within herself and as I fly with the angels themselves. I’ll close my eyes. The walk is over; the destination was truly destined.

I lived, I walked. Found love and ecstasy; Now I must sleep. ”

From the gates of heaven,

xoxo